Sunday, May 31, 2009

Jill + Kitchen Gadgets = Maaania

I woke up this morning with an uncontrollable urge to bake... so I started to get the stuff together to make pretzels and while I was reaching in the cabinet to get a big pot to boil water in I caught a glimpse of the rack I bought at IKEA last weekend that I now have all of my pot's lids neatly displayed in and I was immediately filled with adoration and excitement... that's right.... I LOVE MY POT LID RACK ! and I want the whole world to know it! I never knew what to do with all the damn lids I have for my pots and pans 'cause they've all got little handles on top and don't stack neatly like the pots do, but then I remembered that my mom had a little rack that she put her lids in and I was like, "oh I'll just go and buy one of those" but I went to like 5 or 6 stores and couldn't find the device I as looking for, but then I went to IKEA and they have EVERYTHING YOU COULD EVER WANT FOR YOUR KITCHEN THERE! so obviously they had a pot lid rack and an attractive one at that so now I have so much more space in my pots and pans cabinet that I could buy like 4 more pots and still have room due to the fact that I organized my stupid lid jumble and put it neatly in a rack. POT LID RACK YOU ARE AWESOME!

I also love the 2 new knives I got at IKEA...(IKEA is not paying me for this blog by the way... although I would totally be down with corporate sponsorship, so if anyone reads this and you know some big wig at IKEA send them my way... I've got some nice things to say about their dressers and desks too, but I'm not gonna throw that out for free right now) Anyway, one of my new knifes is designed for the specific purpose of cutting vegetables and though I have been eating vegetables for as far back as I can remember I have never had such a knife before in all of my life... I've used it every day since i bought it and every day it has exceeded the hype I have built up in my mind about how great it is... it just slices through onions, mushrooms carrots and every other veggie I have pitted it against like it's sliding through a heaven, so yeah, I've just been slicing my way to heaven for 7 days straight...

I don't even need the cooking utensils to be in my home for them to excite me. I just like to be around them in stores or in other peoples houses... or even seeing cool kitchen things on TV gives me a little buzz... 'cause I see those things and I'm like "someday... someday you may be mine shiny wheat grinding kitchen aid stand mixer attachment for the kitchen aid stand mixer that I do not yet have"... wow... that will be awesome when I have my pimped out kitchen aid... and I'm not a brand whore... it doesn't have to be Kitchenaid... but I really do wanna grind my wheat to make fresh ass flour... I grew about 1 bundle of wheat this year... I think that would make almost 1/4 cup of flour... and I think I could use that to make a tiny cupcake... so that'd be pretty awesome...

Anyway, as I was standing there in the kitchen awe struck by my new cooking devises I started to think that maybe I was being a little weird... my knives don't literally turn me on (omg I just remembered that one flash back episode of Friends where Monica was trying to seduce Chandler with a sexy kitchen knife and then accidentally cut his toe off... that was a good episode !) Anyway, unlike Monica on Friends, I don't want to actually bump and grind with my lid stand or my veggie knife, but seeing them in my kitchen does genuinely put a cherry on top of my day. I've even had days that have been completely turned around by cooking gadgets... today for example... I woke up and it's kinda foggy and gray and blah outside and I was thinking about how its Sunday so I have to go to work tomorrow and was generally not feelin' super chipper, but I knew I was gonna get to make pretzels so that cheered me a little bit, but then when I saw my lid holder BAM I WAS IN HAPPY LAND... and an hour later I am still sittin' here ridin' the happyland express ! So thank you lid holder for elevating my mood from asi-asi to QUE BUENO!,

At this moment obviously I don't feel ashamed or weird about my love of culinary gadgetry, but I did have that brief moment where I was like... wow I must be some kind of freak 'cause of the way kitchen stuff gets my motor running... not many people (that I know) talk excitedly about their new cooking tools, so I was like hmm... maybe this is a weird freakish obsession... but then it occurred to me... archaeologists find remnants of dishes and bowls and cooking tools that were totally decked out with elaborate pictures and designs and made of expensive metals and obviously cherished by their ancient owners... and cookware and dishes are something that pretty much every society around the world had. They didn't all have shoes or written language, but food service, that shit was obviously important to like every society ever, so I guess I am not a freak at all, I'm just being human by loving food and food related utensils... and anyone who denies the excitement that a new kitchen gadget can bring is obviously the one who is some inhuman freakazoid.

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